Wait on the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait on the Lord! Ps. 27:14
Who likes to wait? We wait in traffic, in line at the store and for guests to arrive for a dinner party. We wait for the coffee to get done brewing so we can have that perfect cup in the morning. We wait on our children to give us grandchildren. We wait at airport security, we wait on the perfect job to come along, for stores to open and for the price to go down on that perfect outfit or piece of furniture.
But waiting on the Lord is much harder than waiting for any of these things.
For many years I have had a deep desire within to be married again. My first marraige tragically ended in me becoming a widow after three short years. Since then, I always knew that I wanted to marry again someday. But who knew I would still be waiting on that perfect someone to come into my life twenty three years later. Yes, you heard me right, 23 years.
Waiting on the Lord is hard.
I know God has a plan for my life, we are each born with an eternal destiny, so it is hard for me to understand why God has not yet blessed me with someone to share my life with, share my family with and to share in ministry together. Am I destined to live the rest of my life single even though I have a deep desire to be married? I don’t know the answer to that question, however, the Bible says, “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Ps. 37:4). This verse doesn’t mean we’ll always get what we want, but it does mean we can trust God to give us what ultimately will be for our good and his glory.
So I wait patiently.
What do we do when we are patiently waiting for the Lord to give you the desire of your heart? Pray, serve God in ministry, help others in need and seek Him through reading the Bible and fasting. These are all things that I have learned to do while waiting on God. During our time of waiting, we can begin to have a more intimate, worshipful relationship with Jesus if we are putting these things into practice.
These diciplines are not always easy, however, my life doesn’t depend on whether I get married again or spend the rest of my life as a single women. My life is centered around serving God in the best way I can and letting His plan fall into place in His timing, not mine. “My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,’ says the Lord” (Isa. 55:8).
One of the things that I have started doing daily is praying for my husband. Being intentional in asking God to protect him, guide him, and that he has a heart for Jesus. I have found that praying for my future husband every day has brought me closer to God in a different way realizing that I am already the bride of Christ.
A good book I have found to assist me in daily praying for my future husband is: “31 Prayers for my future Husband, preparing my heart for marraige by praying for him,” written by Jennifer & Aaron Smith. You can find the book at Unveiledwife.com. I think it is important to be intentional to pray for your husband both before and after marraige. I think it is also important to tell God what you are desiring in a mate. I still believe He will give me the desire of my heart when the time is right.
In the mean time, I WAIT!
With all that being said, I have relinquished my singleness to God and am content in whatever life God chooses for me whether it is as a single woman in minstry or a married woman with a partner in ministry. Both singleness and marraige are a calling from God. As 1 Corinthians 7 indicates, singleness is, if anything, a higher calling. As with everything else in life, we should ask God for wisdom (James 1:5) concerning marriage. Following God’s plan, whether that be in marriage or singleness, will result in the productivity and joy that God desires for me.
Lisa Harper stated in Today’s Christian Woman: “Single, married, widowed, and divorced women aren’t all that different. No matter what our marital status is, if we’ve put our hope in Jesus Christ, we’re God’s beloved. We’re the apple of his eye. He delights to call all of us his.”
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name, you are mine” (Isaiah 43:1b; italics added).